Omg, like what a bitch

So theres this new girl in school who goes by the name Bennie

I'm like, mad jelous of her because shes totally more emo than me.

She goes aroudn cutting her boobs in class and all the guys be looking and yelling, OMFG TAKE OFF YOUR SHIRT with teh teacher yelling behind them.

She also writes the most emoiest poems like, evar

her latest poem that was on the bathroom wall was

I WILL HORRIFICLY SPAWN BROKEN EGGSHELLS FROM THE BAKERY DOWN THE STREET ADN MAKE THEM FLY AROUND CUTTING YOUR FLESH WHILE THE SHELLS CUT OFF THE BALLS FROM THE MALE AND PUT THEM IN BAKING BATTER WHILE THE FEMALES WILL COOK ME SOME BROWNIES BECAUSE IM HUNGRY AS FUCK.

She like, not only was the biggest emo in school, she was also the biggest bully too

She took this kid's lunch money so she could buy marbles so she can throw them at this one kid so she can jack his pistol so she can rob the bank.

shes like, so fucking badass.

She went up to me one day and asked how I was doing.

I flicked her off and was like

"bitch, get the fahk away from meehs"

and she was like

"bitch wtfux, i tryin to be coo witchu and wtfux"

and i was like

"getcho need a perm lookin ass outta here"

then she got really pissed off and was like

"BITCH NO YOU DII'NT"

and I was like "BITCH I DIIT"

then she took off her belt.

I took out my belt.

She took out her hat.

I took out my hat.

She took off her earrings.

I took off my earings.

She took off her high heels.

I took off my high heels.

She rubbed her makeup off.

I rubbed my makeup off.

She took off her tampon.

I took off the rolled up red soak paper towel out of my ass.

She tackled me and scratched my nose and I pushed her away and I pinched her nipples as she screamed "OMFGUX DAT HURTS LIKE SHIETT"

then she pinched my niplpes and i was like
"OMFG DAT DOES HURTS LIKE SHIETT"

then I grabbed my knife.

She grabs her machete.

I was like "Wtfux wheres da hells you git dat"

and she was like "betch dis be my emo knife"

and I was like "holy shiets you hardcore as fuhks"

then she came up and slashed my right arm off.

I was like "OMFGUX YOU FUCKIN SLASHED OFF MY RIGHT ARM"

then I laid in my puddle of blood.

I licked it so I could get it back in my body.

Which is stupid because if I suck it up it won't go back in because i'll just shit/pee it out.

then she was also laying next to me and tried to drink up my blood.

I was like "omg, you likes mah shit too?"

then she was like "ohh yeahh dis shit be on fire"

and im like "omfuxinggod like, i totally know what you mean"

then i was about to kiss her thennnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn

i twisted her titties again and jumpe dup

i was like

"YEAH BITCH!!!! I DA HARDCORE EMO NOW!"

then next I remembered was lieing in the nurses office with a machete in my belly.

Shes a liar

someone at school found out about my blogs

her name is janice dullivan.

she said she likes my blogs alot and says it that I should keep writing more.

I think I have a reason to live now

she keeps eating with me at lunch and keeps talking about stupid stuff like algebra 2 and basketball and stuff.

I dunno why but she looked so hawt for a orange girl.

I took my right hand and placed it on her left breast and she gave me a look and our convo was like

"wtf are you doing?"
"I thought i was suppose to do that"
"what the fuck do you mean?"
"i've seen it in movies"
"what movies do you be watching?"
"if you've read my blogs, you should know what movies im talking about"

then she giggled and I was shocked.

she had the most horrid laugh i've ever heard.

it soudned like 2 bluebirds were having intercourse during a construction site and hayeanas were screaming as they were getting gang banged by screamo metal bands.

I quickly ran into my next class and mr.rawrrawr gave me a look

I said OMFG THERES A SERIAL KILLER AFTER ME AND SHES BEHIND THIS DOOR

he walked up and pushed me aside and letted janice in and he said Be my guest.

next thing she sat next to me and kept giggling.

omfg i wanted to stuff some thanksgiving stuffing into her throat.

how could such a human being be born with such a demonic laugh.

it's like as if she was born from satin and was raised by a howler monkey.

I scooted her closer to the window so I could push her off and let the evil spiders pick her up and drag her back to the cave where she came out of.

then janice looked at me and said she likes me.

i was like omfg.

someone likes me.

i looked at her and was like

is you furreals.

then she was like giggling again and was like totally.

I fringed when she giggled but smiled when she said totally.

i held hands with her afterschool after i cutted myself.

the blood was all over her hands and she licked it.

it was very erotic.

hehehehhehehehhehehehehehehehehehe.

a week later she told me she lied all about it.

she only said she liked me so she could experience the emo relatoinship.

i got back at her by writing in the boys locker room

JANICE DULLIVAN IS A SLUT.


a week later she contracted HIV.

Emo Andy made the basketball team

My dad told me to join the basket ball team because he says i need to practice to handle balls

better because i keep dropping them whenever i see my dad drops his pants.

i told my gym teacher i wanted to join the basketball team and he said

"Get cho fuckin emo muthafuckin titty fucking ass outta here you little fucker"

so I turned aroudn and walked out of the gym then alluvusudden a jock yelled out

"HEY LETS TEABAG THAT EMO KID"

then he threw a basketball at my head so i can get knocked unconcious so he and his big fat toned sexy hunk of jock friends come and have their way with me

but the ball boucned out of my head and made it into the basket.

the teacher saw me and said

"Wow you little fucker, you made a fucking basket, I need someone like you for fuckin shit."

he slapped a uniform on me with the number 69 on it and it had lots of holes on it.

he said the hole came from the last kid who didn't made the winning basket and the entire team

took turns ripping a hole in his uniform with their penis while he was still wearing it.

later on we had practice and everyone gave me looks when their penises were erect.

we went into the locker room and everyone whistled at me and kept saying they wish I had a vagina.

ohh how I wish I did have a vagina at that moment.

then this guy Randy, who threw the ball at me picked me up with the hair on my testicles and said

"DONT FUCKIN RUIN THIS GAME FOR ME TONIGHT OR IM FIST YOOH"

I said okay and crossed my fingers

ohh i hope he fists me.

because i hear that fisting is the equivelant of riding a bike without a seat on it.

so that night we started sucking the game because I kept giving the ball to the other team because they said they knew where i live and were gonna blow my head off.

i only gave them the ball because i thoguht they said they were gonna blow my head off, as in my penis's head.

we eventually tied when coach put me on the bench and told me to stop fuckin fuck up the mutha fuckin game you little fuckin albino spoon fucker.

we tied the other team 1 to 1 and he said he needed someone out there to make the winning shot.

I saw Randy out there really sweaty and tired so I wanted to help him out.

I took the knife I hid in my hair and threw it at randy and it went through his throat and he had to go to the emergency room right away.

yessssss.

then the announcer people guys says the game has ended because someone is severiously enjured in the game.

yessssss.

i quickly ran up there and rubbed my body with his blood that was on the floor.

yesssssssss.

Andy and the asian

I saw this hawt asian guy at school that i've been stalkin for weeks

his names Meng and hes like those short asians that are buff as fuck with small penises.

gosh i love men with small penises, we have so much in common.

I figured that I was going to admit my feeling for him so I came up to him before geometry

I came up behind him and tapped him on the shoulders. I twirled my hair so I can get him hard, I

hear asians really love that kinda stuff.

He turned around and looked at me from head to toe and shooked said, "Wat dew yooh wahnt?"

I started blushing and giggled at his accent. He shooked his head at me and said "wite boi yooh betta moob o I gunna kicks yo hass"

I asked him does is he in a relatoinship

Then a girl name Shantifwa walked up to him and was sticking her tongue in his earlobes.

I gulped and putted my hand down my pants to stroke it the beast

I gave him these black roses I picked from some womans grave and said 'these are for you'

He looked at it and threw it at the ground.

I looked into those sideways asian eyes and watered a bit.

"How can I prove my love to you?!"

I quickly rubbed my hand on his shoulders and moved my head closer to kiss him and he pushed me away. My eyeliner started leaking and I was on the ground crying.

He said "betch, dun FACK WIT MI OR I CAWL MAH BRO AND HE FRUM DA FEETCONG"

He started walking away and I saw the life we coulda had together flashing through my eyes. How is he gonna have babies with me when I go through a sex change? I quickly yelled out
yelled out, "I LOVE YOU MENG, I FUCKING LOVE YOUUU!" I ran up behind him, pulled his pants and boxers down and was about to open my mouth wide when he sawked me in my right jaw.


I was rushed to the hospital right away because they thought I was bleeding black stuff, but it was actually my eyeliner.